Spring Cleaning
For seasoned Albertans, Spring is that time of year when you experience all four seasons in a month. Realistically it just seems that way. For many, spring is more commonly associated with “spring cleaning.” We clear away what is not needed to make room for the new.
This spring I encourage you to open the closet where you have stored the things you would like to forget. That closet contains memories of painful failure, broken promises, unfulfilled dreams, and deep disappointments. The content of the closet gives us a sense of shame, guilt, despair, and insecurity. We want to keep that closet locked tight so that no one can access our skeletons to perform an autopsy and reinforce our guilt.
It’s time to do some spring cleaning. That closet must be emptied. You may say, “Just a minute, Duane. You don’t know what’s in my closet. If you did you wouldn’t make such a strong statement.” You are right. I don’t know what is in your closet, but I do know that after having access to hundreds of closets, there isn’t anything you could disclose that I haven’t already heard. This leads me to the first step in spring cleaning:
1. Say No to the Lie of Individualism. You are not the first or only one who has experienced what is locked in your closet. That is an axiomatic truth. Individualism claims that what we have experienced is unique to us. No one else has gone through or had to deal with what I did. I have worked with people on every continent and multiple countries. The cultural context of the closet changes but the root cause of what motivates our choices is the same.
2. Kill the giant of self-pity! Self-pity is destructive. It is like a creeping paralysis that slowly immobilizes us. Self-pity is a masquerade for pride. My wrong choices are not really a reflection of who I am. If you see what I have done, you will pass judgment on me and I’m really better than that. The real damage of self-pity is that it creates a negative focus — “I’ll never do that again!” That negative focus becomes the standard by which I measure what I am doing in the present. I end up duplicating the past but only in an inverse way.
3. Say “NO!” to the cancer of entitlement. Entitlement places me at the center of my world. It measures life in terms of the benefits that I derive. In other words, “What’s in it for me?” When this is operating, we will look for someone to blame. We fall into the trap of victimhood. I like how the Calvin and Hobbes cartoon puts it.
Calvin: Nothing I do is my fault. My family is dysfunctional, and my parents won’t empower me. Consequently, I’m not self-actualized. My behavior is addictive, functioning in a disease process of toxic codependency. Nothing I do is my fault. I need holistic healing and wellness before I’ll accept any responsibility for my actions.
Hobbes: One of us needs to stick his head in a bucket of ice water.
Calvin: I love the culture of victimhood!
4.Posture yourself as a learner. I have said this before and will say it again. Our places of failure are a treasure chest of learning. Success can lead us down the slippery slope of pride. Failure can bring us to the treasure house of wisdom. In the house of wisdom, we learn how to put the right piece in the right place at the right time for the right purpose. Did profit motivate me to act with expedience at the expense of principle? Was I using people rather than developing them? Did I care more about the bottom line than those who worked to produce the bottom line? Did I look for input from those whose character was reflected in the culture of their business? Am I a self-made man or can I acknowledge that I need the wisdom of God for my life?
Hopefully this spring you will have the courage to open the closet, bring out the skeletons and let God breathe new life into them. Go ahead, unlock the closet and I’ll see you at the top.
Duane Harder
