Developing the Power of Influence
Last month we started looking at ten possibilities for developing the power of influence. Here is a brief recap of the first five.
- Look for the gold in the rock.
- Keep your word.
- Admit your wrongs.
- Agree on limits, rules, expectations and consequences of any contractual agreement.
- Separate a person’s value from their performance.
This month let’s explore five more steps we can take. These will expand the horizons of your influence and move you from good, to better, to best. - Perform Anonymous Service — It is one thing to serve when we are assigned a task but quite another to serve an anticipated need without being asked. A servant will focus on the task assigned. Someone with a “servant heart” will focus on a person’s need and look for ways that they can enrich, enhance, and expand the success of the one being served. The person who performs anonymous service is saying I am more interested in making you successful than establishing my importance.
- Anchor Relationships in Common Ground and Expand your World in the Differences — In order to do this I need to know the values of the person that I am serving. This involves taking time to get acquainted with the person. What are the company values? What is the mission statement? How could I help the person I am serving be more successful? What strength do I have that will cover their weakness? Differences in values, procedures and worldview can be opportunities for personal growth.
- Determine the Legacy You Want to Leave — Do you want to be remembered as the person with the hammer or the one with the heart. As a person who is loyal, faithful and committed. Or someone who serves his own interests. In the Viet Nam conflict two close friends were together on a mission. The two friends were separated and the one out front was struck with enemy fire. His friend said to the commander, “I’ve got to go rescue him.” The commander said, “It’s no use. He won’t survive.” The friend insisted and was granted permission to go to his friend. He went, got his friend and headed back. When he arrived back, the friend was dead. The commander said, “I told you there wasn’t any use in risking your life.” To which the friend replied, “When I got there, he was still alive and he said to me, ‘I knew you would come.’” Here is a man who would leave a legacy of loyalty, faithfulness, and commitment.
- Reward Open, Honest Expressions and Questions — Too often we punish displays of honesty by upbraiding, judging, belittling, or embarrassing the one who has spoken their mind on a policy, procedure, or way of governance. The fact that people have trusted us with their opinion needs to be emphasized. Why they hold their opinion is more important than the fact that it may disagree with the policy. We honor them most by trying to understand them before we try to correct them. Far too often the child is dismissed because they are a child, and the employee is discredited because they are a “laborer.” The words that are expressed can be a verbal freeway to the mind, heart, imagination or values of the one who has spoken. Don’t let “rabbit trails” hinder you from investigating a “freeway of thought.”
- Live With the Law of Love — The highest level of love says, “I will seek your good at my expense.” Putting it in other words it is the willingness to embrace inconvenience and immaturity because I see the possibility of helping you become a better person. People react when they feel used to “fulfill a vision” or “meet someone’s personal need.” Love invests in a person because they see the possibility of future development. Lust, envy and greed are looking for an immediate return on their investment.
When I teach this material in a seminar, I suggest that those attending select one or two items from the list as starting points. Then I suggest that they write out steps of action they will take to implement what they have listed.
Information with implementation results in growth. Information without implementation usually results in stagnation. Write out your steps, start climbing, and I’ll see you at the top.
Duane Harder
