“In Everything Give Thanks”
Are you serious? I just got laid off and you are telling me to give thanks for that. Furthermore, the doctor just informed me that I have stage four cancer and you still want me to give thanks?
I didn’t say, “Give thanks for everything.” There are many devastating circumstances that can knock the wind out of our sails or flatten us with despair. I don’t give thanks for what has happened but I can learn to give thanks in the midst of the circumstance.
First let me remind you of the two primary enemies of gratitude.
Victimhood — In the cartoon Calvin and Hobbes, Calvin makes this statement: “Nothing I do is my fault. My family is dysfunctional and my parents won’t empower me. Consequently I am not self-actualized. My behavor is addictive functioning in a disease process of codependency. I need holistic healing and wellness before I’ll accept any responsibility for my actions.” Calvin’s sidekick Hobbs responds: “One of us needs to stick his head in a bucket of ice water.” To which Calvin replies: “I love the culture of victimhood.” Victimhood is to life what acid is to metal. It erodes our strength and paralyzes gratitude.
Entitlement — I have the right to possess my own private reality and expect you to bend to my wishes. We feel entitled to an explanation that must match our perceived values. We have been bombarded with the message, “You deserve a break!” “You owe it to yourself.”
At the root of entitlement is the insidious vice of pride. I set myself above you and expect you to meet my expectation. I am at the center of my world and you are here to meet my needs.
Wherever victimhood or entitlement exist, you can be sure that gratitude is diminished.
Gratitude and contentment are close friends. Ask most people in the west how much is enough and they say, “A little more.”
The next time you are being seduced by an ad that is trying to convince you that you need the product being advertised, ask yourself this question, “What value will possessing this product add to my life”? Is it a status value or a productive value? In other words will it project an image that enhances me or will it make my life more productive?
Gratitude is a magnet that sweeps through your life and looks for all the ways you have been blessed. Gratitude is thankful for employment that provides for my basic needs. It is thankful for teachers that have invested in my life to equip me for productive living. Gratitude prompts me to look for ways that others have enriched my life and added to the person that I am.
Gratitude is an attitude that we develop not something that is transferred genetically. It is enriched when we develop the heart of a servant and the devotion of a son. The heart of a servant says, “What can I bring to you that will add to your success?” The heart of a son says, “I am grateful for the gift of life that has been given to me and I want to honor you for your part in making me the person that I am.”
On the practical side, think of three people that have invested in you and helped shape the person you are and write each of them a thankyou note.
Remember, each night as you close your eyes, give thanks for the day you have had and the one that is before you and I’ll see you at the top.
Duane Harder
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