ADHD: NOW WHAT?
How to move ahead?
Receiving an ADHD diagnosis can change your life for the better. People want to know what exactly they are dealing with, to what degree and what they can do about it. Most can relate to the symptoms by referring to pop-psychology, a conversation with another parent, a friend, family member or a co-worker. When you hear others say: “You might have ADHD” or perhaps suspect it yourself, then it is time to get a proper evaluation.
Phase one: Strong Emotions
First, there are all the feelings that come along with getting a diagnosis of a condition you dealt with all your life, but did not recognize. When you receive a diagnosis, it can trigger strong feelings. These vary from shock, to tears of relief or joy, while some choose to keep it to themselves. Some people need to forgive themselves for fear that those close to them may not accept or believe them, but instead will judge and criticize them. Finally, there is an explanation for why you think, feel and behave the way you do. More importantly, there are starting points to improve your life and to move forward in a practical way. These include skills and strategies to manage your time, tasks and emotions.
Phase two: Exploration
There is now a basic explanation of how your behaviours make sense in your life, work, studies and relationships. Don’t panic. If a child is old enough to understand, include them in any considerations in a positive way. Aspects include how to live and learn better with the many challenges and opportunities their ADHD presents. Develop their personality by building on their strengths and talents, while mitigating their weaknesses through supportive interactions with others. You may reach out to others and look for camaraderie to share your stories, experiences and information.
Phase three: Frustration
ADHD is a permanent, chronic condition which is a sobering fact. You may say: “Why didn’t I find this out sooner?” It is important to consider co-existing disorders such as anxiety and depression. It can also shake your self-identity as you come to grips with a new sense of self. Remember that all can be managed with interventions that are aimed at reducing the core symptoms. Once you are aware of what are primary and secondary, then treatment begins.
Phase four: Acceptance
This is where you embrace the new part of you. You have come to terms and accept how your unique ADHD related thoughts and behaviours show up in everything you do. You have found ways that work i.e. routines, habits, dietary and lifestyle changes, medication, neurofeedback, therapy, etc. You no longer judge yourself based on the opinions of others or compare yourself to those individuals who do not have ADHD.
Phase five: Embracement
This is the point where you have researched as much as possible about what it means to have ADHD. You have figured out your strengths and opportunities for growth. You realize that without ADHD, you would not be the person you are today. You know how to apply them in many areas of your life. You start to advocate, learn and inspire others. You let them know they are not alone, but that they have a voice and a friend who understands.
Sources:
Hallowell, E. (2019). Next Steps: After The Adult ADHD Diagnosis.
Sinfield, J. Untapped Brilliance Blog: Five Stages of the ADHD Emotional Journey.
Roché Herbst
M.A.R. Psych
My practice location is from my home office in Bragg Creek Mondays and Wednesdays 10am-5pm; Calgary office Tuesdays and Thursdays 9am-4pm. Call or text me on (403) 510-9984 or email: info@wehcs.com
